(update: Yesterday for some reason, both of my blog posts did not get updated with my writing corrections. I was mortified after I realized it hours later. It has been fixed now :-))
A few months back, I received an email with this question, "Dear Milly, do you ever get sad and when you do, what do you do to get over it. I'm in a depressed funk and can't get out of it. " I ended up emailing the young lady, but I wanted to share a few of my answers with you. Of course I get sad and depressed sometimes; I'm human. But I learned a long time ago, that in most cases, you have the power to control your mind and especially your happiness. So here are some lessons to be a happier person.
1) Focus on the positive-Here are two ways I can think about my life: "Aww man, seven years ago, I quit a great paying job in finance so I could pursue my dreams, and it still hasn't happened." or " Aww man, that audition went wrong, I must suck." Holy crap! I'm already sad just writing that. Time to change my thinking. Here's how I choose to think about my life: "Seven years ago, I quit my high paying job to follow my dreams. No, my dreams haven't come true YET, but they WILL and while I'm waiting for them to come true, I am having a lot of fun a long the way." or "Yes that audition didn't go so well, but hey, this prepares me for the next one, which I will rock." When you choose to FOCUS on the positive out of every situation, believe you me, your whole outlook on everything changes for the better. I hear JLO is a huge believe in positive thinking and her life seems kind of awesome. Click below to read more tips:
2) Don't look at what others do: I've blogged about this time and time again. When you compare yourself and your journey to others, you are doing a huge disservice to yourself. When you start focusing on what others are doing, you lose sight of how amazing you are and of all your accomplishment.s When you look to others, it should be for inspiration, not to envy them.
3) "Don't talk about it-Be about it"-My brother used to say this to me all the time. He was always a go-getter. We were born with practically nada, but my mom instilled dreams in us from when we were kids. Every weekend, she would take us to an open house for an expensive apartment in New York City. The realtors always looked at us funny. They probably knew we couldn't afford a million dollar apartment in the heart of Manhattan, but when we would leave, my mom would say to us, "You can have that, you can have anything, just work hard for it." It took me years to believe that I could make my dreams come true, but my brother always believed in himself, and in his abilities. He would always say, "I'm going to be big one day. I can do anything I want." etc He believed in himself and he worked incredibly hard to make sure his dreams came true. I'm very happy to say, his dreams have come true and then some. Don't just talk about your dreams and think they will happen, work your ass off and make them happen, and you'll see them come true right before your eyes and that will lead to a happier you.
4) Help as many peeps along the way as you can -I've blogged about this before, but I'm going to reiterate it. When you help someone else, believe me when I tell you, you are helping yourself. Every single time I've helped someone, my life has been changed for the positive. It works. Believe me. Sabotaging someone else will only bring bad stuff your way, so don't do it.
5) Don't take No for an Answer When It Comes to Your Life- When I worked in finance, and I couldn't get something done, my boss would always ask me, "why?" I would say, "we just can't do it!" His response, "You're asking the wrong person." Someway or another, he would always get everything I couldn't get done-Done. What I'm saying is: When it comes to your life, if someone says no to you- that's not acceptable, ask someone else, keep asking, believe me, you'll get it eventually.
6) Don't give up-My mentor in my head Loren Ridinger, had this great post recently where she wrote about amazing and accomplished people who never gave up, even when their dreams seemed impossible. Here's a few things she referenced:
Michael Jordan (world's best basketball player) once didn't make it into his Highschool basketball Varsity Team.
Winston Churchill, graduated lowest in his class.
Part 2 coming soon.
Hope this helps,